Thursday, May 31, 2007
Normally, when you're taking about women, “that time of the month” is a bad thing for guys ...

but not when it’s the new June 2007 Mistress Julie Calendar.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Mon Dieu! French hypocrisy will be flowing like EPO tainted piss this summer if the ASO bars Mr. 60%, but allows Zabel ride Le Grand (De)Boucle.

Lettin' the EPO flow

Check out PsychoCross Art's quick and dirty opinion of the whole mess.

And speaking of fallen heroes, what about Oscar Sevilla's triumphant Stage 4 hilltop win at the Volta a Catalunya?

Nice job you doping asshole. Where's the DNA sample?

Thursday, May 24, 2007
Happy Birthday Mistress Julie!!! She really wanted a stripper, but on such short notice, this was the best we could do.

At least we got her a nice cake ...

Eric Zabel has always been a class act, and you’ve got to have even more respect for him now. Everyone is now looking to Riis but considering the rampant use of EPO during that period, what happened in the 90’s should probably stay in the 90’s.

Just focus on the matters at hand, like how the fuck is Danilo DiLuca out climbing Simoni? Basso did it last year and you know he was on the juice.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007
While this woman seems to have quite an elaborate system in place to help minimize her tan lines ...

... she aint' got nothin' on RideTrash Legal Council Jeff in the nipple ring innovation department:

“I’ve been doing this with my nipple rings and the suspenders of my cycling bibs for years. It prevents that occasional back and forth rubbing that can lead to chafing.

Of course the only reason I can do that when I’m cycling, is that I unclip my car key from my nipple rings and put it in my jersey pocket.”

And while we're all in the middle of being mildly disturbed ...

Who could have imagined when the original Star Wars movie was released 30 years ago that it would spawn a bunch of shit like this?

Thursday, May 17, 2007
This just in ... Someone twitted LeMond's wiener and so now we're of course obligated to believe him when he claims that Landis told him he doped during the Tour???

Lead poisoning does cause dementia you know

Tuesday, May 15, 2007
What do you get ... other than five worthless twats whose only caloric intake (before self-induced vomiting) is from vodka and sperm ... when you combine Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie and the Olsen Twins?

Answer: The Superficial Friends!

Check out the new blog from Mistress Julie ... I think our "dirty" little girl going to be 29 again this year.

Thursday, May 10, 2007
Yesterday marked 2 years since RideTrash.com spawned like a painfully massive, corn-dotted chort from Dave’s sweaty, anal orifice ... a moment in history loathed by those with even a shred of morals or decency.

So, how long do you think before Tyler Hamilton uses the excuse that the blood bags found in Fuentes’ office actually belong to his “vanishing twin” who was only “attempting” to dope?

And while we’re on the subject of twins, shouldn’t this girl be wearing a helmet or something?

Wednesday, May 9, 2007
The Amgen Cycling Club recently announced that one of their female mountain bikers landed a modeling gig for Wahoo’s Mexican restaurants.

That’s great, but who decided to feature her in the fish taco ad?

Monday, May 7, 2007
While Ullrich went the "you caught me red handed but I’m still going to plead my innocence” route -- At least Basso finally had big enough balls to come out and admit his involvement with Dr. Fuentes.

And what is this? Valverde's name has been added to the Puerto list and the French dream of a podium finish in Paris just got a little better.

Speaking of podium finishes, Mistress Julie found herself on one last weekend.

Even though the French couldn't race a bicycle to save their lives, those rude little fuckers can sure play some metal.

Check out Gojira.

Friday, May 4, 2007
A new report out calculates that the worth of a stay-at-home mom is about $138,095 a year.

There are probably more than a few guys out there wondering exactly when did cleaning, chauffeuring soccer teams, wiping baby shit and nagging begin to pay that much.

Of course, a price tag like that might be justified in certain situations ...

Only Sex-Crazed MILFs Need Apply

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